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Only employees and/or job seekers may read this column. Employers must skip this and go straight to the candidate resumes.
O.K. folks, now that we're alone, let me tell you the story behind this blatant rip-off of Nancy Reagan, mutated into my "Just Say Oh"
campaign. This works great for job seekers and also for employees or consultants negotiating anything from salary to the next fetcher of donuts.
Salary first. I know you've read myjobsearch.com's salary range information and used the relocation calculators, if appropriate. Sooner or later, a
company will make you an offer, and you have to respond.
Let's role-play. Interviewer: "I can offer you $60,000 for this position." You: "Oh."
That's all you say. Inside, you may think, "Hot dog, that's a 20 percent raise," or, "I'm horribly insulted." Outside, the only
sound you make is "Oh."
This takes great self-control. It takes more self-control to say nothing, which has an upside of making you appear disciplined, yet a downside of making
you appear indifferent. A friend told me about his negotiation with a Nashville music company for a book of guitar arrangements. They made their first
low offer. He countered. They expressed concern. He waited.
Not talked, waited. "I knew whoever spoke first would lose."
I'm not as tough as John was; I can rarely keep my mouth shut. But "Oh" gives feedback, but soft, almost useless feedback.
Realize the first salary figure offered always changes. The amount tends to be, at best, around the midpoint of the salary range for that company. If
you're a woman, a short man, or a minority, the sad truth remains that the offer is almost certainly lower than a tall, white man with nice hair would
receive. (Hey, look it up! Tall, white men make more money—always have).
If their offer to you was 20% higher than you expected, it could be 25% higher. When you say, "Oh," you negotiate without negotiating. You
acknowledge their offer, but don't commit. What they say next will tell you what they really think about their offer.
Their next statement may well be "Of course, a person with your credentials deserves a bit better. How about $62,500?"
Your response? "Oh."
"OK, $65,000 and a company car. That's all I can do." Are they telling the truth at this point? Probably pretty close. Remember that the third
objection, and third offer, tends to be the real one. Each time you "Oh" them, they will feel pressure to improve their offer.
Don't say, "O.K." Don't say, "Oh what a horrible offer." Just say, "Oh." Then wait.
If the manager (never let a HR person hire you, meet the person you'll work for) knows the tricks, he or she will try to push more out of you than
"Oh." Give neutral responses or ask questions. "Why $60,000?" "I see, please go on." "Really?"
Current employees also benefit from Just Say Oh. "Since you missed the meeting yesterday, we all voted for you to install the new system in
Siberia—in January."
If they're kidding, your explosion of disbelief and anger will make their joy complete. If they're serious, your curse-ridden response will suggest you
aren't a team player. If you say, "Oh," they'll have to give you the details. The joke is ruined, and the video of you exploding won't
be played at the company Christmas party.
Remember, job seekers are in the driver's seat now. McKinsey & Company released two factoids recently. First, 75% of top corporate executives claim
they are short of talent. Second, birthrate information says there will be 15% fewer Americans in the 35-45 age bracket in 15 years. Economic growth
projects to increase 3-4% per year. In fifteen years, college kids graduating now will be in 25% more demand, just when there are 15% fewer of them.
Good times will continue.
But good as they are, times can always be better. Counter any offer with an "Oh" and see what happens.
Try it on your kids. "Mom, Dad, all the cool kids will be hanging out at the mall Friday night. Can you give me a ride?" Turn the page of the
newspaper, look at them calmly, and say, "Oh."
The mall doesn't need any more kids hanging around. And you didn't have to argue and have a fight. Life is good when you Just Say Oh.
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